I never thought much about "permanent decisions" until I met my husband. He told me that at one, very low, point in his life he almost made one of those. And now someone else in my family has struggled with that in the last day or two. He reached out to me, and I'm glad he didn't do it!
I'm sorry to be so blunt, but this is one of the most selfish decisions you can make! Who are you to decide how long your life should be; depriving your future children of a parent and future loved one of a spouse, not to mention all the things you leave behind for others to take care of!
I know that life is hard, I know that some days are more difficult than you think you can handle, but the promise of tomorrow is that YOU CAN GET THROUGH IT! Nothing is so bad that seeing yourself in the future should be a question.
Look at it like this....if my husband had done what he thought, our life together wouldn't have ever happened. Our two boys certainly wouldn't exist or any others we have. I believe God made him for me...what if he weren't here? I may have married a jerk...and once I asked him what he thought about me being married to someone else and I'll just tell you that the idea didn't sit well with him!
Please talk to people! You are worth far more than you realize, and even if It's to a future someone...wait for them, it will all be worth it! I'm praying for you!
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