When Real life meets the blog world

So, I have been inspired! Not by any person that I can see, or touch...today anyway...but by a blog that I ran across. The Ugly Homemaker is the name.

Many times blog posts can make everyone else seem like they live in Utopia, and because you have a hard time keeping up with everything that it appears they do while they brush their teeth, you must not be cut from the same cloth. Let me tell you, life happens at our house!

 I get upset with my children and my husband, regularly. I don't like dishes, though I love to cook, and I ask my husband very sweetly every chance I get to do a load for me....PRETTY PLEASE! My laundry is my my never ending story. My oldest is a firecracker who throws lovely tantrums and has started to bite when he gets angry. My middle son loves, "NO", and throws his food on the floor if he doesn't like it. Our daughter is a mommy's girl, and so far very quiet, but I am nursing her so there are moments where I just pray that my older two don't figure out that I left that pen on the counter until I can go get it. And our dog is a devout coward who hates to be outside for more than 1 minute if it is over 68 degrees....we live in OK, all summer it is far above that!

Real life happens! Messes, bumps, and burnt bread. It's never as calm and organized as we want. The garbage doesn't get taken out, you spill coffee on your white rug, and you are doing preschool with a little one who has a resistance to sitting still.

I prefer real life! I love my babies and my husband. We play, we eat, we fight, we get over it! I am blessed beyond all measure!

I actually ran across a little thinkg that I loved and printed off to put in my kitchen....

1st Month of Preschool

Before we had our first child, my husband and I decided that homeschooling was what we wanted for our babies. We both were not satisfied with our experiences in public school as children, and driving past some of the inner city schools, that we are zoned for, it appears that our children will be attending school in a refurbished prison. No kidding, bars on all the windows, brick building, with 8' fences around their play yard. That is NOT what we wanted for our kids.

I started researching homeschool preschool options last year, and I was introduced to ABC Jesus Loves Me. We have been working pretty closely to their curriculum, substituing things that work better for our very busy 3yr old boy.

It has been quite a first month. 2 rounds of sickness, various appointments that interfered with our school schedule, and many other snafus. But, in spite of it all, He has learned! I can see it, and hear it!

My "baby" is talking clearer, asking to "do school", and singing songs. He is a little more patient, and he finally lets me read whole books to him without ripping them out of my hand so that he can "read" them himself. He has discovered the difference between day and night, and he knows "Jesus loves me!", I am one proud momma!

So far his favorite is alphabet work, and he likes the interactive programs that help him to make the letter sounds. And his second favorite activity is art.

I just found some printables that I think he is going to love for next week. One is a Big/Little alphabet matching game, and Dot marker sheets that are fall themed.

I am so glad that God put it in our hearts to teach our children at home! I am astonished by our kids, and how I can be enough for them, even when it comes to their education. His joy in learning makes me feel like a much better mom than I have feeling I was.

On my OWN

I moved from my home when I was 19, and became a live-in nanny for two years. Met my soldier, and got married 3mo after I stopped nannying. And we have been at a base over 1000 miles from any family for almost 4 years.

If we want to see them....we DRIVE! Yes, some of the family from both sides have come to our house and I am very thankful that they feel we were important enough to visit. But, I guess things change.

I talked to one of my family today about my husband possibly deploying within the next 12mo. She was a military spouse, and I appreciate her years of experience, but she REALLY hurt me today!

She told me that she thought my kids and my presence would be a strain on someone else's marriage and potentially my relationships with them and a few other people....WHAT!

I never thought that I was a burden or a sponge before...but I guess I am. I refuse to go where my kids and I are not wanted and even though she was "very sorry she hurt my feelings", there are some things that you say or imply that cannot be undone.

She talked about how having her mother come live with them when they were in the military was such a blessing because she watched the kids, as if I would somehow see how that made her a burden, but that it got harder as her health started failing....no CRAP! People get old!

I am 25, I have three kids 3 and under...but I am not going to make other people watch my kids. I will pay people to do it that WANT to!

I guess, as it seems right now, I only have two options. 1-stay here and be alone with my babies for 6 or 7 mo OR 2- Ask my in-laws if they feel that we would be a burden if we stayed with them. I have never felt more unloved by anyone in my whole life!

How do you go from being wanted to being unwanted when you aren't even around these people but once a year?

Our Share

For a while now I have felt that I couldn't write about marriage because, honestly, things were quite rough. I know that there are ups and downs to married life, and that working along our hills and valleys is what we are to do....

I was angry, hurt, and at times very defiant. No, I don't have to "obey" like some child. Yes, I need to hear my husband when he is telling me things I don't want to hear. And, yes, some of this does fall to him as well...but I have to own my own.

Our church has been having an on-going 5 week series on marriage. And, as I believe God designs things, it coincincided with our little bump in the road. 5 weeks: Seek God, Fight Fair, Have Fun, Stay Pure, Never Give Up. We are headed into the final week.

I would encourage you to look up our church's video feeds for these sermons...they were quite awesome. He lays it all out, and isn't afraid to let you know...he knows what goes on behind closed doors...

Could I?

One of the Facebook pages I am on has a weekly photo contest. This week is "most popular pregnant belly pic". So, I loved my belly pics and I am very happy to share!

I have to say, they are all wonderful! One woman bore a striking resemblance to Dora the Explorer, haircut an all so her husband had her dress up as a VERY pregnant "Dora" with "Backpack" and all. One woman never got to see her belly grow, but adopted her precious one, and took a picture with the ultrasound photo she got confirming her baby's gender held up next to her belly...it was a really touching picture. Then, there was a simple picture of a mother pregnant, holding her youngest and pregnant with another of her children next to her.

I met this woman when I first got to this base. She has 5 children, All had very exciting birth stories. And we had not seen much of eachother for a couple years.

In the time we have been apart, her oldest daughter was diagnosed with a rare form of epilepsy that is slowly causing mental illness. And, just last week she posted that her baby had 17 seizures in one night...Lord, be with that precious child! And her husband is deployed again!

I see her posts daily...uplifting, kind, and full of hope. Hope for a cure for her daughter, and hope that God will bless her with strength for her other babies too while her husband is gone. I wonder, could I be like her if that were my situation?

Could I be full of faith, and not doubt? Happy and not sad? Accepting and not spiteful? I honestly don't know.

I know we adapt to our situations, and I know that I would find it in me. But, I hope that this woman knows what an inspriation she is to people...she is to me!

It just hit...

It's Saturday night...we've done our grocery shopping...our babies are all in bed and should be sleeping (should right?)...and here I am working on my baby's preschool curriculum!

My baby, my first one anyway. A week from Monday this wonderfully silly, rambunctious little man is going to not only start his first day of Preschool...he's going to be 3!

He's now potty trained, he can count to 19(even though there is no 16 when he does, and I love him for it), he asks questions like "what doing mommy" and if I say OW he says "ok mommy?". My sweet BIG-little man is growing up!

It's there and gone so fast! And it hits you at the strangest moments. The time we have to teach and watch our kids is fleeting. I know he's only going to be 3, and he's still technically a baby...he will always be MY baby...but I feel like I want time to slow down.

I want to savor this time and file it away for the times when he doesn't like me very much and tells me all about it....the times that I have to slow him down because he's trying to "grow up" too fast.

I am so excited watching this little boy grow....and I am so curious about the man he will become. But, it is only his third year...I get to keep my little boy a little bit longer. Cherish your babies, pray about the men and women they are going to become, let them get dirty and make mistakes...but enjoy it while it lasts!

Seeing What You Have

Things are going well for our little family. My hubby has just found out that he's getting promoted...YEAH!...and our babies are growing like weeds. We have had our share of trials recently, but I see a light at the end of this current tunnel.

I follow several military wife facebook pages for our base. Some are for general info, some are for "feel good" comments, but one in particular seems to hold my interest. It's a little like the "real military wives of..." insert our current location. There are anonymous posts about who they know that's doing this or that...posts about how their marriages and family lives are going...and posts about general military questions.

I like being able to give advice. I like seeing that people can be honest and say that not everything is sunny in "paradise". But, then you see the posts about people who got fortunate enough to be stationed in the same city...state...tri-state area...as their family.

They complain about how their family member didn't watch their child so they could do this....or they wouldn't come to their child's important event....

Honestly, I don't feel bad! At no time since I have married my soldier have we been close enough to any of our family to invite them to a birthday party or just go on over to their house because we felt like not being alone that day. We had to tell my in-laws months in advance that we didn't have anybody who could watch our boys while I was in labor with their sister....MONTHS in advance, not weeks or days.

So, here's my comment....You don't know what we would give to be able to have family that was near us! I want our kids to know their family, but so far it's because we have made sure that they see both sides at least once a year...meaning we pack our car and our kids, stop our mail, my husband has to take leave for almost 3 weeks, and we drive! We drive for 36 hours and sometimes more depending on which family we are visiting. And then we drive some more because people have this annoying habit of not wanting to put forth any effort to meet you where it's convienient for you, even though you just made a HUGE trip just to be close enough to even see them before having to meet them at the inconvienient location they picked.

See what you have right next to you! If you get stationed even 8 hours from your family, count your blessings...you could have to drive 36 hours with three kids under 3 and dog! Just a little food for thought.